Today is a bad day for me... my hands are stiff, I'm off-balance, I have continuous pain in my elbows and hips, not to mention my back. It's day's like this I appreciate so much having JoAnna to help take care of Joey. But even that is changing. I had to tell her yesterday that I was going to have to cut down to two days a week because of budgeting (in reality it probably should have been cut down to one day) and she in return told me that she may not be able to accomodate him much longer on a part time basis. That made me so sad, but I totally understand. Her youngest will be going in to pre-school starting in January and she is thinking of going back to college to get a degree in physical therapy. I'm so happy for her, but don't know what I'll do.
I seem to have more bad days than good anymore, although I don't usually share that with anyone. Joey going to Miss JoAnna's has been a godsend as it's given me a mini break every other day during the week, allowing me to rest so that I could have more energy in the afternoons when I have him home with me. This isn't how I imagined raising my child(ren) would be when I was in my 20's, but then again I wasn't living with constant pain in my 20's either. I thought I'd be able to do it all - play, discipline, life in general when it comes to raising little ones.
Joey's growing so fast that I can barely pick him up anymore because it's just to painful now that he weighs over 30 pounds. Needless to say this has caused me more than one crying bout. I want to be able to snuggle with him, and play, and share adventures with him. I want him to know about the wonders of outdoors, camping and hiking, bike riding... all those things that normal folks just take for granted. I don't take much of anything for granted these days. I know that each moment I get to participate in is a true blessing. I just wish I could participate more.
Okay, that's enough wallowing now. I'm going to snap out of it. Be thankful for what I have, and that we have a fun day decorating pumpkins with my Cradles to Crayons group planned for this morning.
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Oh my dear sweet sister. You are an amazing Mom. Joey is one of the happiest, most well rounded, energetic, intelligent and loved babes I have ever known. Please don't bw so hard on yourself. Every moment with him is a gift whether on a bike, hiking or just spending some quiet time with him crafting or reading. You have lots pf people who love you both to help with the physical stuff. I only wish all the babies in the world had half of the quality of parents that you and Larry are. I for one, am very proud of my sister and the Mommy she is!! I love you!!
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