Fibromyalgia Bender

Boy have I ever been on a bender this past week, a pain bender that is. I've hardly been able to move at all. Find myself counting the minutes until Larry gets home to give me some relief from caring for Joey and that's on top of having him in day care 3-days a week to help me out on a regular basis in managing my pain.

I have to say I'm at my wits end with this. It's becoming the worst I've ever experienced and I thought I'd seen the worst it had to offer a few years ago when I put myself in hospital to get it and me dealt with.

Thanks god for my family - helping out where they can, whether it's taking Joey into daycare or picking him up from there, offering to have him for part of the weekend, my mom entertaining him until I can get enough energy built up to take care of his basic needs. It's over whelming and makes me feel like crap that I can't provide everything Joey needs when he needs it. I'm his go to person. I should be able to help him achieve whatever it is that he wants to achieve whether it's getting more juice, coloring, reading books, or going for a walk around the block. BUT NOOOO, that's not to be because I just frankly don't have the energy, at least not today, or even this week, to help him out with every need on his list. It hurts my heart to see him cry because I'm not up to going for a walk. A simple walk just around our two cul-de-sacs that boarder us on each side.

Thank god for Joey's smiles, and mom's ability to make me laugh, and Larry's willingness to help out, provided I write out for him specifically what I need done. I wish men could learn to speak and hear the same language as us ladies. It would simplify my life I tell ya. Ah well beggars can't be choosers, and there isn't one in my family who isn't a keeper in my book, so I guess I just have to work whatever system gets them working so that I don't have to feel like such a lousy wife, mother, sister... you get the idea and can probably fill in the blank for yourself.

Calgon take me away, please take me away to a land of sleep and awesome maid service. Now that's a dream.